Lessons Learned From the Night

What I learned (was forcefully reminded of) last night:

Cats are nocturnal.

Ernie is amazingly playful for a 20+ lb teenage cat.

Ernie is *very* talkative when he's awake. And when you are the only audience in the house (all other humans and animals are presently elsewhere), he has A LOT to tell you--especially if you forgot to give him fresh water and stir his food around before bed.

Mojitos, while full of minty vitamin C goodness, do not actually contribute to restful sleep.

It's much lighter at 5:44 am in Boston than it is here in Atlanta, (as evidenced by what was on the HenCam at that time--and what does it say about me that I was looking at someone's live webcam feed of their chicken/bunny play yard at 5:44 am?!? Even the animals have the sense not to be up yet!)

Now I'm going back bed to try for a little more sleep (and leaving Ernie safely DOWNSTAIRS).

Let There Be a Post

Let there be a post. It's been a long time since I posted here, but life is in a Great Shift and I feel like waxing if not poetic at least philosophical. And I already posted on Glass Incarnate today. (Oh, and for those of you waiting for Ernie to post again, I have wrested the laptop away from him--maybe permanently.)

Cynthia had a profound affect upon me during my short week in Portland with her. A bit of it was surely the newly post-50 shift (really), and another bit was BECon (which always has a profound impact on the way I think and be), but most of it was Cynthia. Since I visited Portland, I find myself hyper-aware of every Story that passes by me. Well, let's be honest, I miss most of the stories that stream past my body on a daily basis--everyone does as there are as many stories as there are bits of pollen in the Atlanta spring air at any given moment around each of us.

Is the story I am thinking about now the man with the lovely Jamaican lilt is his voice getting up to board the plane while talking into the bluetooth Borg thing coming out of his ear, or is it the middle-aged woman (age determined by voice and circumstance alone--I never peeked) with the stern voice telling her children to "Stop it, stop it right now" as they get on the plane. Or is it the tanned, streaky blond-haired woman in the polka-dot dress who earnestly explains to the gate attendant that she and the kids (she needs a stroller check) are traveling with her husband who booked at a different time and they would like to be seated together. Maybe the story is the 23 year-old law student I talked to over Cesare salads who is from Southern California, and who lives in Birmingham now and was just home visiting his mother (his father died of a very rare cancer five months ago). No. The story is life. The life that streams by, the life that my 87 year-old step grandmother Marion would like to see tomorrow and is not sure she will. She told me today that she didn't really think about living til 90 until recently when the doctors told her to enjoy this summer as it is her last. Now every day that she wakes up is a welcome surprise...

I am one of the last ones on the plane. I sat at the departure gate and typed as fast as my spastic fingers would go, and then I got up, ran onto the plane, got out my laptop and am writing some more. I find myself bursting with a connectedness to the other Stories all around me and a desire to record, validate, revere them.

Thank you, Cynthia, for reminding me of this part of my humanity. It is too easy to retreat to the studio cave and forget that other (pesky) humans exist. But if one takes the time to notice them, they turn out to be not so pesky after all.

Krishna?

The day and the adventure go on. We are staying at the Best Western in Cave City KY tonight. I was somewhat startled upon our arrival in this tiny, sleepy town this afternoon--we were the only car in the motel parking lot--by the "This motel owned and operated by the Krishna of Cave City". It was a bit... unexpected... to say the least!

After checking in we headed up to Mammoth Caves--and a parking lot packed with spring breakers from all over over this side of the country. First we picked up a Junior Ranger program book from the information desk for Jessie, and she is on her way to earning her first junior ranger certificate. We were disappointed to find all the cave tours we wanted to take sold out for the next four days. We took a short self-guided tour this afternoon and tomorrow we'll do the New Entrance Tour and that will end our time here in Mammoth. Tonight I'm going to research a bit to pick another cool Kentucky State Park between here and Natural Bridge State Resort Park (where we have reservations for Friday and Saturday).

Eagle Falls--More Hiking...

I sit in the dappled sunlight on the little deck off the bedroom of our cabin at Cumberland Falls for a last post before heading to Mammoth Caves National Park a few hours west of here. Yesterday after the in-laws left we took a little 2.3 mile hike to Eagle Falls (including the bottom and the top of the falls) and the surrounding area. I am not whining or a wimp--really--but it was the weirdest hike I've ever taken.

First we went from the river at the top of Cumberland Falls all the way up to the ridge line on the eastern side of the river. Then we went all the way down to the river again--but this time at the bottom of the falls (also the bottom of Eagle Falls). Then we went up to the top of Eagle Falls, then up to the top of another ridge line, then down into a valley between ridges, then back up to the original ridge line, THEN, finally, back down to the river at the top of the falls. It was so steep for much of it that the trail had stairs--either rock, wood or metal--built into it.

We didn't see any black bears (in spite of the warning signs posted everywhere), nor did we see any other wildlife--not even a squirrel. Do you think they have all been eaten by the locals?

As with any good trail there were periodic trail markers painted onto the trees to let you know you were still on the right path. However when we got back down to the river by Eagle Falls, the trail sign was painted on the boulders in a follow-the-yellow-brick-road kind of way. I figured it was enough to hear the noise of the falls and follow it, but I guess a little reinforcement never hurts.


It was a gorgeous trail, I'm really glad we did it, but wow was it a tough 2.3 miles! The beer back at the cabin was especially welcome.

Spring Break

It's spring break. J has the week off and Dave took the week off (at my insistence) so the least I could do was take it off too. Our destination? Cumberland Falls State Resort Park in Kentucky, a place from Dave's childhood family vacations and source of find memories--just what we all needed after a long stressful winter!

We packed up the minivan and headed into the wilderness--just like our pioneer ancestors--to meet up with my in-laws here in Kentucky. I'm from Montana, how daunting could Kentucky be? Turns out to be pretty daunting. For one thing, it's dry, and I mean dry as a bone (as in NO ALCOHOL!). For another, Tennessee just across the border is dry but for beer... Oh joy. I am getting in touch with my inner redneck. Then there's the whole no cell phone coverage (even the cabin at the lake in Montana has cell coverage). At least there's Internet (wireless in the cabin!) and three tv's in the cabin--which is moot for me as we left the Apple tv at home the better to enjoy the wilds.

But it is beautiful here in a southeastern mountains kind of way. The first night we were sitting out front waiting to go off to see the moonbow, and we heard an irritated squeak followed by some rustling. Turned out to be a couple of raccoons behind the cabin. J was all excited and wanted to follow them down the cliff. We dissuaded her. We actually came a couple of days early just so we could see the moonbow (shown at left). The moonbow we saw was very subtle--only about 30% of the arch visible and a soft misty white instead of rainbow colors. The one in the photo is someone else's photo of another moonbow night at Cumberland Falls. For us, it was the last night of the full moon and maybe that made it less bright. We were also told to go at 1:30 in the morning as the moonbow is most visible a half hour later on each successive night of the full moon (it was at 11:30 on the first night).

We all took naps starting at 10:30 and got up at 12:45 to drive down. I'm glad we didn't try to walk the trail as it is steep and narrow and we only had one little flashlight between all of us (so much for our wilderness skills). Even with the nap J was pooped and not up for Mom taking pictures.

Yesterday we walked from our cabin to the falls. It is hard for me to refer to it as a hike because we went steeply down to get to the falls and I think of hiking as going up (first). We got the hike part on the way back up and it was really warm--84 degrees and it's only the beginning of April! The deciduous trees are all still bare of leaves which only emphasizes the stark columnar skeletons of the pines decimated by southern pine beetle. The damage is so bad they warn you not to hike on windy days as there is serious risk of damaged or dead trees falling (and killing you).

Okay, everyone's back from their walk. It's time to have some lunch, play a game or two
(Alhambra, Set, Race for the Galaxy, Waterworks or one of several others). Maybe later I'll have a beer and a nap...

Tuffy's Big Adventure

I have taken the blog from the cat. After the past two days, I am invincible! I am very tired, still thirsty, and my mouth is packed full of seeds, but I need a place to tell my tale and, well, the cat is snoring on the couch (as usual) so I just took over the blog. Here we go.

Friday afternoon the little girl had a playdate with a friend. She was showing me off (as she likes to do) and when she was finished, she and her friend went away to play somewhere else. I was glad because it was the middle of the day and, you know, hamster, nocturnal and all. I had sleep to do and didn't really want to be bothered. But later, later when I woke for the evening, I noticed that she had left the door to my cage open... Oh. My. To Mexico and freedom!

Just to be clear, I don't actually know where Mexico is. My family was originally from Syria, but I've been in this country for generations (lots and lots and LOTS of generations). But I've heard it's beautiful and warm with lots of senoritas and pina coladas. The closest I've come to a senorita here is the bunny, Jasmine, and she scorns me. (*sigh*). So I headed to Mexico via a long drop to the floor, and headed out the kid's bedroom door. But then I got a bit lost.

Somehow I ended up in the big people's bathroom off their bedroom. The last time I escaped I ended up there too, and I was so tired I just fell asleep in a corner. This time I managed to stay awake long enough to poop a lot in the corner and then skeedaddle for parts yonder. I think I really confused the big female human with all the poop because the little girl told me the big female human searched all three closets off the bedroom and bathroom several times looking for me. Heh. The little girl was also made to empty out her closets and look for me, and the big female human searched the entire upstairs--closets and all--again the next day. But I'm getting ahead of myself.

I made good my escape on Friday and, apparently, the little girl didn't notice I was gone until Saturday afternoon. When my absence was noted by the little girl, she had several minutes of indecision and consternation, but eventually she went to the big female human in tears and said she was afraid the big female human was going to be mad at her, but she had to tell her she had left the cage door open and I was missing. The big female human sighed and trudged upstairs with the little girl to look for me, but it was in vain. They searched and searched the upstairs, but what they did not know was that I had, in the dead of night on Friday, braved the STAIRS. and not just the stairs, but TWO flights of stairs, the CAT and TWO dogs to get all the way downstairs to the basement--though I really shouldn't count the big dog because she couldn't care less about tracking down her own meals and just ignored me. In fact, the cat is pretty lazy too. I think he saw me come down the first flight of stairs and head for the basement stairs and he just kept dozing on the couch. Guess he's more into bacon than hamster (lucky for me).

So while the humans were all searching upstairs (even the big male human looked for me a bit on Saturday) I was down in the basement. I don't know how I got all turned around and thought Mexico was down there, but once I got down all those stairs (and wasn't THAT exciting!), I couldn't get back up. Heck, had it not been for the little girl having a playdate today, I might have DIED down there! She told me that when she and her friend came down the stairs, she was concentrating on something else, but then she saw a streak of brown move out of the corner of her eye (it was me, I was still looking for Mexico). She and her friend chased me round and round the room (and under the treadmill several times) before she caught me. I really wanted to go to Mexico, but then after all that running and two days with no food or water (the little girl told me they had been putting my sleeping box and food out for me in different parts of the upstairs each night since I escapayed), I decided it would be good to let the little girl catch me, cuddle me, feed me, and tuck me back in my bed.

So now I'm back in my home, the big female human came and petted me and made a fuss over me too, and I am none the worse for wear for my adventure. Maybe next time I'll get all the way to Mexico.

I'm Back...

Yo. I'm still here. Been hard to get to the computer even though the female human gave up Mafia Wars. What can I say? I sleep a lot. I have firmly staked out the couch as my own, and anyone wanting to share it has to bring me tribute. Life is good--though it did get annoying for a bit over Christmas when the little girl's grandfather came to visit and brought his obnoxious dog.

The grandmother brought her bird too--but they were smart and kept it upstairs in a cage. Too bad, it looked a tasty morsel. The one day the grandmother brought the cage downstairs and had it on the table I hopped up and peered in at the bird. It said "Hey bird!" to me. Stupid bird. Or maybe it was just hoping I was come to play a game with it. Yeah, I have a good game. "Here little birdie, let's play hide and seek. you hide, and I'll seek you... with my teeth!"

The grandfather's dog was a German shepherd basset hound mix (picture a shepherd on really stubby legs) and it's favorite game was to charge me as I lay on the couch and jam it's nose into my face. I thwacked it a few times with my paw (claws extended, of course) but it wasn't too bright and didn't get the hint. Dogs. Who needs 'em? The deerhound wasn't too fond of him either. She bared her teeth, growled and snapped at him when he got too close to her. Guess he wasn't too stupid 'cause he stayed out of reach. Man, she's got some serious teeth!

Now he's gone home and the I get to sleep uninterrupted again. It looked for awhile like I might actually finally move to the studio, but the male human deemed it too cold there for me yet so I still have the couch. The female human is preparing for my move by getting a studio cam (so you can all watch me sleep on-line) and a comfy bed for me. The male human apparently won't let her move the couch. *sigh*

Life is good here in Atlanta. I haven't had a chance to eat either the little girl's hamster or her bunny, but there's still time. They look tasty, and I can move fast when I want to. Just ask the female human when she tries to block the door and keep me in at night. I am a stealth cat then, and fast like the wind.

The deerhound was sick over Christmas--looks like cancer in her nostrils, poor thing. But she is cheerful and perky still--and best of all, when she gets her pills in raw hamburger, the Spaniel and I get balls of raw hamburger treat too. Sweet.

Thanks for all the birthday wishes. I got chicken leather dog treats from the new family, and it was good. Wish Dee would visit again soon--she brings the best tribute.

Keep those notes and letters coming, I'll get the little girl to read them to me while I lay on her legs.

Later...

Happy Thanksgiving (Yumm... Turkey)

Between the little girl and Mafia Wars, my life is pretty sweet. The female human is a soft touch and sneaks me ham, turkey, bacon and other meat treats. I surf the dogs food and water as I please. The couch is mine. I even race outside every few nights to do my business in the garden and test the chilly night air--and I just like making the human female sit on the couch waiting for me to be ready to come back in. Life is good. I am still enormous.

Love, Ernie.

To Mexico and Freedom!

I made a break for it tonight. The female human opened the back door onto the deck to let out the deerhound for her nightly facility visit. It had been raining and the deerhound--the royal dog of Scotland--was reluctant to go out and get her feet wet. Wuss. The female human scolded her till she finally went down the stairs to the backyard, then the human left the door open for her to come back in while she went to take the garbage out the front door. I saw the moment, I made it mine.

The female human noticed I was gone immediately when she came back in the front door and went to close the back door behind the deerhound. The last she had seen me I was snoozing on the back of the couch, then I was gone. I heard her standing in her bare feet on the wet deck calling for me in the dark. She sounded pretty frantic but trying to hide it and be perky and upbeat, "Ernie! Here kitty, kitty, kitty! I have some tuna for you!" When I ignored her (there were things to smell in the backyard and I knew she couldn't see me), she went back inside. She came out a few minutes later with a box of something crunchy sounding that she rattled saying "Ernie, dinner time!" Hah. Like I was going to be fooled by that box of the kid's goldfish crackers.

Finally the door to the garage under the deck opened the light from inside streamed out, and she came out calling for me. Even though it was drizzling a bit and I'm not so fond of the rain (cat and all), I made her wait. I let her walk all the way to the end of the driveway right before she would've had to walk out onto the grass of the backyard and I watched as she hesitated walking out there in her bare feet. Then I slipped in behind her and sauntered into the open garage. When she turned around and saw me, "Ernie! (sigh of relief) I'm so glad you're back. Come on in now for some tuna.", I nonchalantly sat down, washed one paw and waited for her to coax me back in.

Sure enough, she opened a can of Spam for me (though I had to share it with the dogs). She fretted about the sodium, but she couldn't find the tuna and she wanted to reward me for coming back in (sucker, I have her trained now) so she gave me (and those dogs--you should've seen that spaniel slather) the Spam (and lots of fresh water). I was dignified. Yeah, I trotted after her a bit quickly as she headed to my food dish, but can you blame me? I'll say it again: Dry Diet Senior Cat Food. Blech.

Tomorrow I heard that Dee is coming with more tribute--this time in the form of bacon treats. It's about time!

Taking Charge

It was a good weekend: I am finally getting the humans and the spaniel trained. I'm still not sure how I feel about the Unfortunate Event of Saturday night, but the outcome has been okay so I'll let it slide this time. Around 9:00 pm the little girl went out onto the screened-in front porch to feed her bunny (yeah, she can feed the bunny... to me!) and I strolled out to look at the moon and test the scents on the Atlanta evening air. Well, clearly the little girl was not paying attention to me and she went back into the house and closed the door behind her! No one even noticed I was gone until the next morning. Apparently the little girl went looking for me first thing on Sunday and finally spied me out the office window. There was much exclaiming, much petting and many belly rubs (but still no bacon), and all was forgiven. It would have been better if I could have figured out how to get the bunny cage open while I was out there, but there's always next time.

My night on the porch taught me one good thing though, I need to have more of a presence around here--no more days under the bed. It's time to sleep on top of it--make the humans move. I have finally located the refrigerator in this house, and another good place to sprawl is right in front of it. Every time the humans open the door there is always the possibility that something yummy will drop out, and even if it doesn't, if they are cooking, they will get so irritated at having to step over or around me that they'll give me a treat just to get me to move.

Last night the humans here had friends over for dinner. One of the guests brought tuna. I could smell it, but no matter how closely I clung to his leg or how nicely (loudly) I asked, he would not give me any. He said it was because it was a Thai salad and had a very spicy sauce on it that wouldn't be good for my stomach lining. Whatever. But he made it up to me at dinner by feeding me tidbits of baked chicken with chevre at the table. The humans here initially thought this was a Bad Idea, but the females succumbed readily enough. I now rule. I did let the male guest know that I was still miffed about the tuna by taking a bit of his finger with the chicken (but that could also have been just a slip because these were the first treats anyone had given me since I arrived and I was hungry and tired of diet dry food).

Today I have made my place on the back of the couch here I can watch the rain and snore. Loudly. Ah, just like home.

(Hey! The female human just sat down in her chair with a chocolate donut... I wonder if she'll share?)

Still No Bacon

They have begun to bring me tribute, the natives of this place. The first day two men named Todd and John brought a pink and purple mouse hanging from a purple stick on a pink string for the little girl to bat me with. They apparently thought I should chase it or something. Sniff. Then Becky brought a small white. blue, and pink mouse filled with catnip for me. Now that's what I'm talking about! I spent the day under the big humans' bed again--with the mouse--only coming out for belly rubs and to let them know the facilities were lacking.

I think my former landlady needs to have a talk with these people. I mean, I climb all the way up those stairs to get under the bed, and I'm pooped! Downstairs they have a bathroom with a glass and tile cabinet in it where they keep my litter box, food and water. They also have another cabinet just like it in the bathroom right off their bedroom, but, hey, no litter box, no water, no food, zip, zilch, nada.. I walked up to the glass door while the man was in the bathroom today and I told him--loudly, he doesn't seem to hang on my every syllable yet--that I thought there should befacilities in there too so I could avoid that annoying spaniel that hangs out on the top stair (he's not allowed upstairs--thank heaven for small mercies). The man ignored me! Can you imagine? The little girls is still my slave though, she accompanied me downstairs this evening and kept the spaniel out of my way.

Still no bacon, nothing but this dry diet stuff. But one more day of the big pitiful-eyed look, and they'll come around.

Day 1 in Atlanta

The big female human that got me out of that crate last night went out for awhile today and left her laptop behind. I'm not sure how much time I have before she comes back, but I have to get a message out to let everyone know what's going on. There are *dogs* here! I hate dogs. There also appear to be tasty grey squirrels, but they're outside the screen of the porch I'm on and I can't get to them.

After I got out of the crate last night I spent the night in a bathroom with a litter box, a cat bed (I preferred to sleep in the corner under a lean-to of plastic bin lids), a water dish and some kind of limitless food dispenser. I've got to say, I was pretty jazzed about the food until I tasted it. Blech. Dry, diet cat food. I must've died and gone to hell. Where's the bacon?!? I was told there'd be bacon here, and tuna, and fish... All I have so far are a couple of stinking dogs and diet cat food!

Oh yeah, I apparently also have a little girl. I spent the day under the big humans' bed--no, I wasn't sulking, I just wanted to be by myself and away from Those Dogs for awhile. Anyway, the little girl went off to some place called school this morning (she wanted to take me with her, I'm glad the big humans said no) and she earnestly promised me she'd be home soon to cuddle me. When she got home, I wouldn't come out from under the bed. The big female human had come upstairs earlier in the day, and when she called me, I came right out because I was sure she had brought me an offering of bacon. But no, she carried my downstairs and put me next to her on the back of the couch to pet me. All the while the dogs kept giving me the hairy eyeball because they wanted her to pet them and she kept scolding them and telling them to get down and leave me alone. Hey guys, this wasn't MY idea!

Now I've taken control of this communication device, and I'll use it to keep the word about my captivity in the south coming out. Uh, oh. She's home and calling for me... something about introducing me to the bunny. More joy.